KIDS YOU LOVE BUT YOU DON'T LIKE

In this article I'll be talking about how to deal with the difficult one in your family and how to pray for them.

Most of us feel exhausted while raising kids whom we don't like, but there is an obvious love running in our blood for them, spending too much time with them and our expectations in response to our efforts, we trying to change them into our way, I don't think it works always, rather it's gonna be more and more tiring. Sometimes you need to take a step back, let them be on their own and leave the rest to God. A minimum of effort and a small prayer everyday, a kiss to the child everyday, I think this is something which is gonna work on the long run.

Have you heard about the story of the bamboo and the fern. God planted the bamboo and the fern seeds in the mud at the same time, he cared for them both, he gave them water, he gave them light, yet only one of them grew faster, it was the fern, it grew quickly and was beautiful and shiny green, bamboo was showing no results, but God did not give up on it. He continued to water it like he did for the fern. After a few years, the growth of the bamboo startled everyone. It grew out to be the tallest and the strongest of all. It grew out so strong, its roots went so deep that it is now capable of handling any kind of a storm.

Focus on your child's future rather than the tiny complains you have with him or her. Not keeping the room clean, not listening to you, not reading bible, not attending church services, not behaving properly, stop focusing on these issues. Have a clear image of what you want from your child, a little controlling is ok but don't push too much. Ask God to guide you in prayers regarding the child. Don't exaggerate imagination about his career, leave it God, just keep it simple.

Protect yourself from over exhaustion. Have some me time. Make sure to relax yourself. It's ok to talk to someone about your child, it lightens up the burden your feeling but make sure your child is not listening and also the person whom your talking to is trustworthy. If you're child gets to know that your talking negative about him or her behind the back, you will loose his or her faith. Trust once broken can never be restored. It really hurts bad when children listen to their parents talking bad about them with others.

Most of the times you don't like the child because there is an evil influence. These things are real and you have to address it sooner or later. The sooner the better. The children with neurological problems become the perfect cupcake for evil spirits to feed on. Identify the problem, it'll be better if I put it in this way- identify the "problems", its more than one in almost every case.

HEREDITARY BEHAVIOUR PATTERNS

Your child's behavior pattern might be hereditary, father, mother, grandparents, your siblings, could be from anybody. Try to identify that. Their temper tantrums, eating habits, way of talking, there could also be a patterned demonic interference which previously worked the same way in the person whom your child inherited genes.

IDENTIFY THE NEUROLOGICAL PROBLEM.

The kids with hyperactivity disorders are vulnerable to demonic possession. As I said before, they are the perfect cupcakes. What I suggest is that before consulting a psychiatrist, you make yourself aware of all these disorders. Read about these in google. Acquaint yourself with all of it. Read about ADHD, DYSLEXIA, SCHIZOPHRENIA, AUTISM etc. Sexual hormones imbalance in your child can also be a reason. It's true that non of us want to discuss it with our kids about this and it is also not very convenient to talk about. But it's a reality that cannot be suppressed, once the child crosses puberty, if there is an abnormal hormonal flow in the body, your child moves towards sexual imaginations and all kinds of sexual perversions, which is an "OPEN DOOR" for devil. Get a medical checkup done. See if your child's hormones (estrogen and progesterone) are ok, if any abnormality is found in the results talk to them about it. Please don't hesitate at this stage. Help your child, help him or her physically and mentally. Be someone whom they can rely on, give them your word, tell them it's gonna be only between you and your child and no one else. Teach them about the respective issue, and make them read about it online. Tell them there is absolutely nothing to be scared of or feel shy of. Motivate them, use scripture verses, use your own love filled words, show them the emotion. 

SLOW LEARNER.

The academically weak kids suffer more resentment. How to deal with such a child? I'll tell you all of it, because I was one of that kind. You got to buckle up. Never compare. Prepare yourself to be strict mom and dad when it comes to school work. A little spanking should be good, if this is not working, go the harsh way. Give harsh punishments, your child won't die if you beat him. Make your child understand that there is simply no way your gonna excuse for skipping school work, incorporate this fear in them. Also very importantly, tell them that you are not expecting them to the top student, just doing the work regularly and not failing is enough for you. Sit with them while studying, help them, this can be exhausting because usually teaching these kids is a challenge in itself. Be there for your child if you love him. Love is patient. 

1 Corinthians 13:4-7

Love is patient; love is kind; love is not envious or boastful or arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice in wrongdoing, but rejoices in the truth. It bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.   

Endure it for your baby, remember that cute face when you first saw him, remind yourself intentionally, play the pics on your TV screen, rejoice once again, remember the first time when he saw straight into your eyes and smiled with those glittery beautiful big eyes. Bear the cross for them. Have hope in God for them.

Do not be strict in everything. Don't treat them like slaves or something. When its time to play, let them, when it's time to watch TV let them, let them do what they love to. Make their life at home joyful, for instance if your child loves to paint, encourage him or her. Inculcate a hobby in your child, like dancing, singing, gardening, painting, boys love repairing stuff. Go to the garage near by and ask if they can allow your child to visit. If needed you too go and sit there. Have a pet.

Don't be strict with spirituality, if they like it it's fine if they are telling you they don't like to attend the youth service or bible reading gatherings, don't force them. Let God anoint the child in his way and in the right time. 

May God be with us all and our children. Amen.